EVA: Shinji Ikari Returns from the Dragon Clan - Chapter 230 228 Asuka's Dark Nightmare
EVA: Shinji Ikari Returns from the Dragon Clan
Chapter 230 228 Asuka's Dark NightmareChapter 230 228. Asuka's Dark NightmareAsuka's eyes went dark.
In the darkness, she kept falling, falling, until she reached the bottom of the abyss and stopped, and the feeling of weightlessness also disappeared. Under her feet was the hard ground. Asuka looked around, this dark space was boundless, and she could not see the intersection of the ground and space, as if it was blurred by the darkness.
And right in the middle of this darkness - or in other words, right in front of Asuka's sight, there stood a white door. All that could be seen were the door frame, the handle, and the door panel, and the rest was submerged in the darkness. Even if one looked a little closer, one could not clearly see the wall connected to the door.
Asuka felt familiar with this sudden door.
However, she thought about it again and again in her memory, but she couldn't find where this familiar feeling came from. But she didn't feel much panic about her current inexplicable situation. Because Asuka knew clearly that she was dreaming at this moment - after annihilating the fifteenth apostle.
Then she pushed the door open.
Behind the door was no longer darkness, but a white ward.
There was a little girl in a skirt standing in the ward, holding a worn-out doll in her arms. She had a very childish face, and looked cute and lovable. She didn't have the arrogant air of a young lady that she would later have. That was her childhood self. Asuka understood something just by seeing this scene.
This should be the "merit" of the fifteenth apostle.
I vaguely remember that someone reported in the communication channel that the apostle was detecting the pilot's spiritual wavelength. Asuka can now clearly recall the past memories, everything that happened to her since she was a child, and she can remember it as if she were there.
There was a hanged female corpse on the hospital bed, hanging from the ceiling. The woman's facial features were quite distorted, and her ugly appearance did not need too much time and effort to describe.
The little girl was holding a doll and kept calling her mother to the corpse.
"Mom, please look at me, Mom."
"Come die with me," my mother said in a loving tone.
"Mom, mom, don't kill me, no, I'm not mom's doll."
The little girl cried, tears rolling down her face.
Asuka knew the ending. After the little girl cried for a few minutes, the nurse who was attracted by the noise discovered the scene in the ward. Then a large group of doctors and nurses came to collect the body. A week later, her mother's funeral was held in the snowy weather.
Asuka walked over slowly, half squatted down, and helped the little girl wipe away her tears."Why are you crying?"
"Mom and Dad don't want me anymore."
"Very sad?"
"Yeah." The little girl nodded vigorously, as if to prove how sad she was. Suddenly she puffed up her cheeks and said angrily, "Humph, my parents don't want me anymore, so I don't want them either. I want to think for myself and live on my own."
"Mom didn't abandon you."
"Even if that's the case, I don't want my mother anymore! She was the one who left me first!!"
"This isn't right." Asuka shook her head.
"Idiot!" the little girl shouted at her angrily.
Even though the little girl was so angry, she didn't throw the shabby doll she was holding at Asuka, but instead held her tighter. Her shouting seemed to shatter something like glass, and the white ward gradually blurred. Asuka stayed where she was, watching the scene change around her. Suddenly, a flash of red hit her eyes and quickly disappeared. It was the fiery red Unit 2 that flashed by.
Mom is always by my side, Asuka thought.
The ward disappeared.
It was dark all around again.
There was also a door standing here. Asuka didn't stop and pushed the door open again.
It was probably the living room of an apartment, filled with a cold atmosphere and not much warmth. The much younger father was looking at the little girl who had just disappeared in front of Asuka. The little girl was not holding a doll in her arms. The worn-out doll had disappeared somewhere.
Asuka quickly noticed that there was a doll thrown on the ground. It looked as new as a newly bought doll, but its belly was ripped open, revealing a lot of white cotton.
"What's wrong with you, Asuka? This is a gift from your new mother. Don't you like it?" The father asked the little girl puzzledly.
"no need."
"Why not use it?"
"I don't want to be a child anymore. I want to become an adult quickly. I don't want any dolls."
The little girl said angrily.
As she said the words "becoming an adult", the little girl grew a lot taller in an instant.
She was already wearing a fiery red combat uniform and had been chosen to be the pilot of Unit 2. The girl's body began to grow and develop, gradually shedding her childishness and entering puberty. The beautiful girl stepped on the doll on the ground without mercy, as if it were a dirty stepping stone.
After this conversation, Dad's figure seemed to disappear with the passage of time.
Asuka asked her out loud,"Still a child?"
"No."
"Has that made me an adult?"
"not yet."
Answering Asuka's question, the pretty girl stepping on the doll showed a confused expression. Becoming the pilot of Unit 2 and becoming the ace of the European Air Force, is that enough? Does that mean I am an adult? The girl asked Asuka,"What is an adult?"
"Adult? Whether you are an adult or a child is actually determined by the environment you live in. If there is always someone you can rely on, then you can be a child all your life; but if there is no one you can rely on, you will quickly grow into an adult."
"Is that so?" The girl seemed even more confused. "Without a father and a mother, am I considered an adult now?"
"Not counting."
"It doesn't count now?"
"It doesn't count."
"So when will it count?"
The girl mumbled, thinking about the answer to this question.
Asuka did not answer the girl, and as the girl thought, the cold apartment gradually turned into a faded ink painting, and returned to the deep darkness. Asuka looked at the darkness, not knowing whether the girl had finally figured out the answer to the question. When the apartment completely disappeared, a white door emerged. There was another door in front of her.
She pushed the door open skillfully.
The biting cold wind blew, making people shiver. It was probably a period of time not long after arriving in Japan. In the starry night, two figures stood on the green lawn of the airport. The boy handed over a bunch of fiery red irises as if to confess his love. The girl happily accepted it, and when she saw the boy was about to turn around and leave, she suddenly asked him:
"Am I an adult?"
He turned around, seemingly puzzled by the question.
Then the boy thought for a moment and said in a casual yet serious tone, "Asuka is very good. In my opinion, Asuka is already a very good adult."
"Is this what an adult is?"
"Ah."
"So Shinji... do you like me?" the girl said.
"I like you...a love that is ten thousand times sweeter than ice cream. I like you that much." The boy said with difficulty. His hesitant expression was so obvious, but the girl who was immersed in love did not notice it.
"lie."
Asuka said while watching from the sidelines.
The girl glared at her and threw the fiery red irises at her. Asuka subconsciously tried to catch them. However, as Asuka finished speaking, the entire airport gradually returned to darkness, and the boy and girl disappeared. So she didn't catch the flowers, and didn't even touch the petals.
But this time there was no white door in front of him, only complete darkness.
despite this.
She still didn't wake up.
Asuka had no choice but to walk aimlessly in the darkness. Only then did she realize that her body in the dream seemed tireless. She didn't know how long she had been walking in the darkness, so long that she was about to sulk. The dark space around her gradually turned into an amusement park. On the tall Ferris wheel, there were still only boys and girls in the carriages. The atmosphere was depressing, as if she was suffocating.
"Asuka is probably afraid of losing me, and also afraid of being denied the qualification to be the pilot of Unit 2." The boy's eyes were a little distant. "In recent days, Asuka, you have been trying to please me too much."
"..."
“Before you love others, you must first love yourself.”
"I obviously love myself." said the girl anxiously.
"lie."
Asuka said.
The Ferris wheel stopped, as if triggering some mechanism of this dream, the scene no longer returned to darkness, and Asuka no longer had to walk around in the dark without knowing the direction. At this time, the scene unknowingly turned into a restaurant, and the boy and girl sat opposite each other.
Seeing this scene, Asuka suddenly had an idea in her mind. She would have to sit on the side when eating in the future. If she sat opposite him, it would be easy for people to see her indecent eating posture, which was not in line with her etiquette as a lady.
However, no matter what she thought, the two people in the restaurant were talking according to the established script.
"I have always regarded you as a simple friend," said the boy.
"Friend? Shinji, don't you like me?"
"It's just the kind of love between friends."
"lie."
Asuka said, looking at the boy.
This time the girl did not glare at her. She just looked lost and huddled in a corner, feeling as pitiful as if she had been abandoned by the whole world. Then she left the restaurant and the picture disappeared rapidly, gradually turning into a temporary apartment with deep night outside the window.
Asuka looked at the apartment. There was a TV in the living room with many discs scattered around. Shinji Ikari was holding something on the bed, but when Asuka looked over, he was holding a shadow. This time there was no girl. The girl seemed to have stayed in the previous scene. Asuka thought about it, she walked over and lay down in his arms.
She lay there for a long time, and suddenly said,"Hey stupid Shinji."
"Yeah, I'm here," he said.
Well, I'm here.
He said this many times, and he was always there, always there. Asuka looked up at his face, which was a little different from when they first met. The boy's chin and cheeks were much sharper, and his originally gentle face became firm, which was a sign of growing up.
"Why did you come to rescue me?"
"If you want to save it, save it."
Asuka thought about it, and instead of saying the next sentence according to the script, she said:
"Can I support you?"
"No," he said.
This nightmare is horrible.
Asuka wakes up from the darkness.
The ward was quiet, with only the slight noise of the air conditioner. It was probably noon when the light came on. Asuka didn't know how long she had slept. She slowly opened her eyes and saw a figure sitting beside the bed, holding her hand. The young lady looked over intently and saw that figure was Shinji Ikari.
Seeing her wake up, Shinji Ikari smiled slightly.
She uttered two words in a trance."..."
“…?” He looked a little confused.
"I said Shinji, you look like an idiot."
Asuka said softly.
(End of this chapter)